The Power of Yet
How Kimber Cross is Changing Her Narrative
The Why
“Can’t. Will. Did.” - Kimber Cross
The words you speak matter. Hardly a revelation. And yet so simple to forget. It's easy to get lazy with your lexicon. Words filled with doubt seep into your vocabulary, impacting how you see the world. Kimber Cross is well aware of the influence our words have over us. She speaks about the power of yet - "I can't climb ice, yet; I can't lead a climb, yet; I can't alpine climb, yet "- and how this mindset has shaped her.
Kimber was born with a terminal transverse defect. In other words, she doesn't have a right hand. "I would hide my hand when I walked the halls of my school," reflects Kimber. "The past me had so many insecurities. She didn't know the power and confidence she had." She's referring to what she's learned about herself after spending hours on the faces of mountains across the world. "The mountains taught me things about myself I didn't know existed. I have this passion I didn't know existed. I have this skill I didn't know existed. I walk with more confidence."
But Kimber wasn't always a mountain athlete. In fact, she's only been climbing for 8 years. Growing up, Kimber played basketball, softball, and rugby. But climbing. She enjoyed hiking, but how could she scale a mountain? Other than the famous one-handed pitcher, Jim Abbott, She had no reference point, no one to look up to, especially in the climbing world. That is until she stumbled across a photo of a woman climbing with a prosthetic limb. Coming off a breakup, Kimber took an introductory mountaineering course through The Mountaineers. "I'm going to climb a mountain," remembers Kimbers. "I'm going to grow myself in the mountains as an independent woman."
Kimber's first ascent was Mt. Rainier. Standing at 14,410 feet, it's an impressive climb for anyone. But something in Kimber had changed. The transcendent experience of climbing a mountain changed her. It tapped something insider that had been dormant for far too long. Patiently waiting for her to become the person she was always meant to be. So, she advanced to The Mountaineers' intermediate course. Here, she learned how to approach more technical climbs. She also developed other critical skills, such as planning and leading climbs.
Shortly after completing the intermediate course, a doctor contacted Kimber. He wanted to design a prosthetic so she could continue to climb waterfall ice. So, the pair spent a year developing prototype after prototype. "I didn't just want to be a top rope ice climber. I had goals and intentions to lead and swing lead and really use this as a functional, safe tool that I would trust, and my partners in the alpine would trust."
Kimber has come a long way since summiting Mt. Rainier. She's now the chair of The Mountaineers' intermediate course. In her role, Kimber is responsible for mentoring the next generation of climbers. She's also one of the newest members of The North Face's Athlete Development Program.
To say that Kimber Cross found herself in the mountains is an understatement. "Everything is so noisy in my head. Everything I must do - a stepmom, partner, TNF athlete, teacher. And the mountains quiet all that. Everything goes silent. It's like everything that I've worked for is propelling me up the mountain," exhales Kimber. "I'll get photos of kids with missing limbs. Mothers will write to me saying, 'You living your life gives me hope for my child.'"
The responsibility her new identities carry is not lost on Kimber. Aspiring female and disabled climbers now use Kimber as their reference point. And it is something she doesn't take lightly. But doubt can still well up. "Will I show up for my team? Will I show up for myself?" These are but some of the questions Kimber faces daily.
Kimber's voice is heavy, as if the weight of her words is dragging her down. But then she pivots. And her smile is felt through the phone. "You know that feeling when you have a tough workout, but at the same time, you get that rush of endorphins? You know it's painful, but you know you're growing. I found grit in the mountains. The mountain itself is a difficult task, and what an opportunity to learn new strategies to show or grow my grit."
It becomes clear that the mountain is a manifestation of all the pain and joy that Kimber Cross has experienced in her life. Can't. Inadequate. Incapable. Powerless. These words have no place in her mind. With each ascent, Kimber Cross changes the narrative from I can't - to I will - to I did. And in the process, reminding all of us that the words we speak matter.
The Community
Climbing, at times, can feel like a solo endeavor. And it should. The mountains can teach us so much about ourselves. Those long stretches of silence allow your mind to refocus on what’s most important. You also develop a greater appreciation for where your feet are. But the importance of surrounding yourself with a community that shares your passion is tantamount, says Kimber. “Partners are who you rope up your life to. So, having trust and cohesiveness can make climbs successful. Having a community to train with - for strength and the soft skills of climbing - promotes greater growth in our journeys as climbers.”
The Training
When training for a physical pursuit, it’s easy to confuse the goal with the focus. For Kimber, the goal may be to summit a new peak, but the focus is always on being a strong teammate. And part of being a solid partner is knowing how to suffer. “When you understand that climbing is always a suffer fest, it actually motivates you to find activities and training regimes that keep you healthy and ready for the mountains,” says Kimber. “If I can alleviate some of the struggles of uphill ascents because I put in the time and effort to train - that motivates me.” You can find training programs that induce a kind of suffering but don’t confine yourself to a gym setting. Kimber is adamant that some of the best training is done “at the crag or on a conditioner hike with a weighted pack up your local peak.”
The Food
Most of us are familiar with the term "hitting the wall." It's a phrase commonly heard in endurance circles. It refers to that moment when your body seems to shut down, and focus becomes nearly impossible. What's happening is your glycogen levels are depleted. Typically, all that's required to remedy this is a brief rest. Or, if you're in the middle of, say, a road race, ingesting carbs will do the trick. But taking a break becomes a bit more complicated when you're at 10,000 ft. According to the American Alpine Institute, a mountaineer is estimated to burn 700 to 1,000 calories an hour. That's an insane amount considering your body generally only stores 1,600 calories of glycogen. To stay sufficiently fueled, Kimber recommends bringing food that you don't have to be hungry to eat. "I never climb without a Snickers bar. At altitude, you lose your appetite, but it's tantamount you keep fueling. I don't have to be hungry to want to eat a Snickers bar." Another go-to for Kimber is Tailwind, which is an endurance fuel mix for adventure athletes. It's packed with carbs and electrolytes to support sustained efforts over long periods.
The Gear
Climbing might be a suffer fest. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be comfortable along the way. No word in the English language can accurately describe the euphoria of taking off your climbing boots and letting your knackered feet breathe some fresh mountain air. So, Kimber strongly recommends bringing a pair of flip-flops and extra socks to change into when you’re at base camp. Outside of that, Kimber sees no reason why you can’t treat yourself to an extra dose of comfiness - “I’m a BIG fan of puffy skirts. Get yourself a puffy skirt!”
The Advice
Certain relationships, moments, and experiences shape who we are. They come to define us and our outlook on life. These sometimes wonderful, other times heart-wrenching moments remind us we are alive. As Kimber continues to grow as a mountain athlete, it's clear the impact her mentors have had on her life. But the most influential is Kimber's relationship with the legendary climber Kit Deslaurieres. Deslauriers is best known as the first to climb and then ski down the highest peaks on every continent. "It's like iron sharpening iron," remarks Kimber. "She has helped me understand expedition packing, training, and public speaking. The list goes on."
My $0.02
I have a friend who chooses a word or phrase at the beginning of each year. Those words will be his intention for 365 days. He’ll repeat it to himself daily. And he’ll use them as a guide as he navigates whatever life throws at him. I’m more of a tangible person. So, I carry a token with the words, “Onward, Ever. Backward, Never.” It’s a daily reminder of how I want to live my life. Because the words you speak matter.